Have you ever found yourself hesitant to fully embrace a good thing in your life because of the fear that it will eventually turn into something painful? Maybe you hesitate to trust a loving relationship because of past betrayals. Perhaps you struggle to accept a new opportunity because of past failures. As human beings, we often sabotage our own happiness, not because we don’t want joy, but because we are conditioned to expect disappointment. We unknowingly protect ourselves from future pain by rejecting the very things that could bring us healing and fulfillment.
The Prison of Past Pain
One of the greatest struggles we face is the tendency to relate every event, every word, and every action to a past painful experience. Instead of living in the present, we carry the weight of past hurts into new circumstances, convincing ourselves that history is bound to repeat itself. This mindset robs us of the joy that is right in front of us.
For example, if someone we once trusted betrayed us, we might assume that every new person who enters our life will do the same. If we failed at something before, we may talk ourselves out of trying again, fearing another disappointment. Instead of enjoying what is good, we live in our heads, overwhelmed by anxiety and fear that the past will reoccur. In doing so, we unknowingly push away the blessings meant for us.
Breaking Free from Fear, Anxiety, and Doubt
Fear, anxiety, and doubt are the main forces that drive self-sabotage. But we are not meant to live this way. Scripture gives us powerful truths to combat these destructive emotions and embrace the joy that is meant for us.
- Overcoming Fear – “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” (2 Timothy 1:7)
- Fear convinces us that we must stay guarded, that if we let our walls down, we will be hurt again. But God has given us a spirit of power and love. Instead of letting fear rule, we can choose to step forward in faith, knowing that we are not alone.
- Releasing Anxiety – “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:6-7)
- Anxiety convinces us that the worst-case scenario is inevitable. But Scripture reminds us that when we bring our fears to God, He gives us peace. Instead of dwelling on past pain, we can surrender our concerns and trust that God is working all things for our good.
- Conquering Doubt – “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)
- Doubt whispers that good things can’t last, that we shouldn’t get our hopes up. But faith tells us that God is in control. When we trust Him rather than our own fears, we can walk confidently into new opportunities, knowing that He is guiding us.
Accepting the Good That Is Meant for You
Happiness is not something we have to chase endlessly—it is often right in front of us, waiting for us to receive it. When we stop allowing fear, anxiety, and doubt to dictate our decisions, we open ourselves to the joy that God has prepared for us. Healing is possible. Love is possible. Success is possible. But we must first be willing to let go of the past and give the present a chance.
Take a deep breath. Ask yourself: Am I rejecting something good out of fear? Am I allowing past pain to dictate my future? If the answer is yes, it’s time to break the cycle. God is not calling you to live in the shadow of past wounds. He is calling you to step into the fullness of life, to trust that He has good plans for you (Jeremiah 29:11), and to believe that love, peace, and joy are still within reach.
You are worthy of happiness. You are worthy of love. You are worthy of new beginnings. Accept them. Trust that what is in front of you may actually be good for you if you give it a chance.
Troy P Zehnder 