I’ve spent years studying transformation, writing about it, teaching it, and living it. And the more people I’ve worked with, the more convinced I am of one simple truth:
Lasting change begins with just two decisions. Not ten. Not twenty. Two.
1. Be brutally honest with yourself.
2. Let go of the past you’re still carrying.
These two choices shape everything that follows. Without them, all the motivation, inspiration, and self-help in the world won’t make a difference. Transformation doesn’t start with action. It starts with responsibility.
1. Honesty: The Door You Must Walk Through First
People lie to themselves more than anyone else ever will.
We tell ourselves stories about why we behave the way we do, why life hasn’t gone the way we hoped, why we feel stuck, frustrated, or overlooked. But unless we’re willing to look ourselves in the mirror and say: “This is what’s really going on, and I have a part in it,” we cannot grow. True honesty is uncomfortable. It removes every excuse. It exposes the real problem — the one inside us, not around us. And because of that, honesty is the step most people avoid… which is why most people never change.
2. Letting Go: The Weight You Don’t Need to Carry Anymore
The past shapes us, but it shouldn’t control us. Still, many people hold onto old wounds, old narratives, old habits, and old identities because they feel familiar… even if they’re painful.
“It’s how I was raised.”
“It’s just who I am.”
“This is all I’ve ever known.”
These phrases sound like explanations, but they become self-imposed limits. Your past may explain your starting line, but it does not decide your finish line. Letting go doesn’t mean pretending it never happened. It means refusing to drag yesterday’s pain into tomorrow’s potential.
Why These Two Steps Are Non-Negotiable
You can’t heal what you refuse to face. And you can’t rise while holding onto what drags you down. When a person refuses to be honest with themselves
or
refuses to release their past… Life simply continues on the same track. The same frustrations. The same patterns. The same disappointments. The same outcomes.
Not because they’re cursed, but because they’re repeating the exact mindset that created those results. We don’t get the life we want. We get the life we’re willing to take responsibility for.
The Flip Side: What Happens When You Choose Honesty and Release
Everything changes. Clarity comes. Peace grows. Confidence builds. Relationships improve. Doors open. The future expands.
The moment you stop lying to yourself and stop dragging yesterday behind you, your entire life takes a different trajectory. This is why the first two chapters of my book focus on these principles, because without them, transformation is impossible. But with them, transformation becomes inevitable.
Final Thought: You Deserve the Life That Comes From Growth
If you refuse honesty and cling to the past, you will stay where you are. Not as punishment, but as cause and effect. But if you embrace honesty and release the weight you’ve been carrying…
You step into a life that is finally yours to create.
Two decisions. Two turning points. Two keys that open the door to a transformed life. Make them, and you won’t just change. You’ll rise.
Troy P Zehnder 